It is amazing how one can spend an entire lifetime under an illusion. I recently realized this about myself. All of us have an image about ourselves which we forget to validate with those around us from time to time. The end result is that the world perceives one totally differently from what one perceives oneself as !
A few days ago, I enjoyed a leisurely chat with a friend from my college days after 15 long years! My whole perspective about myself changed in those few hours. My eyes were opened to the fact that I had been blissfully unaware of the havoc / upheaval I had caused during those exciting days. I also understood finally why I had had to undergo some later experiences in life that had always been an enigma. Basically, I learned that even though one's intentions are the best, and actions faultless, the responses of others are not governed by them. Others are unconsciously reacting to the vibes / aura surrounding you which you yourself are unaware of. This conversation made me cognizant of this aura surrounding me.
College life is probably the most memorable period of one's life. I had always thought that mine was pretty unremarkable until this chance conversation that I shared with a friend on a rainy evening. Almost felt like a scene from a film :) I always felt that I had lived in a bubble throughout my college days. This was more because I was a sincere and studious student who believed that college is all about getting a degree to jump start one's career. Even though I pined to enjoy like my classmates, my conscience and my upbringing would simply not allow it. The result was that I often regretted not having made any lasting memories of this golden period. There were some - but there could have been so many more I always felt. My friend enlightened me that I definitely had touched a lot of lives in my class at that time. The surprising part was that I had been totally ignorant of this. Even now it is quite difficult to digest.
They say that life is a journey about finding yourself. Perhaps, I've reached the first milestone to discovering the real me. I no longer feel inadequate or lacking in any way. My self esteem got a mighty boost that day and I thank my God that He kept me humble and innocent throughout this turbulent period.
A few days ago, I enjoyed a leisurely chat with a friend from my college days after 15 long years! My whole perspective about myself changed in those few hours. My eyes were opened to the fact that I had been blissfully unaware of the havoc / upheaval I had caused during those exciting days. I also understood finally why I had had to undergo some later experiences in life that had always been an enigma. Basically, I learned that even though one's intentions are the best, and actions faultless, the responses of others are not governed by them. Others are unconsciously reacting to the vibes / aura surrounding you which you yourself are unaware of. This conversation made me cognizant of this aura surrounding me.
College life is probably the most memorable period of one's life. I had always thought that mine was pretty unremarkable until this chance conversation that I shared with a friend on a rainy evening. Almost felt like a scene from a film :) I always felt that I had lived in a bubble throughout my college days. This was more because I was a sincere and studious student who believed that college is all about getting a degree to jump start one's career. Even though I pined to enjoy like my classmates, my conscience and my upbringing would simply not allow it. The result was that I often regretted not having made any lasting memories of this golden period. There were some - but there could have been so many more I always felt. My friend enlightened me that I definitely had touched a lot of lives in my class at that time. The surprising part was that I had been totally ignorant of this. Even now it is quite difficult to digest.
They say that life is a journey about finding yourself. Perhaps, I've reached the first milestone to discovering the real me. I no longer feel inadequate or lacking in any way. My self esteem got a mighty boost that day and I thank my God that He kept me humble and innocent throughout this turbulent period.
1 comment:
Nilu, wrote after a long long time. Nice post. I can guess the friend you mention. Do write more frequently.
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